Jealousy

I hate the feeling of being jealous

But i am now expressing myself at a public viewable blog to tell every single readers out there that i m terribly, utterly, horribly, hopelessly jealous.

I haven’t been seeing you for like months, maybe .

But , i wont deny that i do cyber stalk you which is creepy every night. but i wont report here what the hell are you doing behind my back and i know you don’t read here, and you won’t be . so .

._.

it’s okay for me to write it here. i am really sorry to make this long but i have to say it here. i hate her.

i hate her being so close with you

i may have try to shut all my emotions and feelings for you OFF, but i can’t . i tried by shutting down my social networks, trying to stay out of civilization. it worked, like yeah

but .

… it didnt now. the scary thing bout social networks are, once you cling on them, you wont get rid of them, unless you get a plastic surgery. okay . that sucks. but what sucks even more is you . oh , or is it me . i tried lots of ways, i dont know to get rid of you.

but whenever i succeed doing so. you do something , that gives and leaves an impression to me. and nonetheless , i dont , hate it. i dont like it but i dont hate it .

because of her, and you

you wont believe what i’ve been through for this week.

I should keep myself busy but why God keep having me here in my room and in front of my laptop, being bored and lifeless. but whenever, i m not in front of my laptop, i would be on my iPhone, looking and stalking, again? Okay, and when i was without iPhone, i would be spending time locking my eyes on Biology, Sejarah okay, maximum 1 hour.

The rest.

you,

again

.

Yes you.

She has, long hair.

i have short hair (sucks)

She has, fair skin

mine’s mixed , idk, all types of color on single tone (sucks)

She , has bracess, but taking them off soon, MAYBE without braces now.

I havent been calling my dentist (goodjob)

She , has a DSLR

i have one, 12.1 canon, digital , not SLR (sucks even more)

She loves to camwhore and goes every places with her DSLR

i never have a habit of , camwhoring THAT much (good, for some reasons)

She, loves spamming her walls.

I hated it, all the good stuff left behind.

She , goes dancing

I only know a few . but , still not the complete song

She, is somehow , korean –ish with small eyes

i love korean , i hate being chinese (loser)

She , haz a smart phone

OK, i have an iPhone, ;) (win . )

She speaks english, fluently.

Hell yeah i know too (bonus)

She sings like a pig

Mine’s awesome (bonus star)

She never sing to you

Ok i did, once .

She never go running with you

Racing ;)

She , goes to your house to hang out

Failed :(

She takes picture with you

Like i said i never had the habit , so (epic lost)

 

I think i will end it here and obviously you know, who wins.

i went singing with my friends today , to make myself occupied and i really miss the feeling of holding a mic and sing those awfully sad songs. i would like to go for a second round, like alone but that would totally suck coz the waiter would come in a lot of times asking how many people would there be in the room and what should i say? 1? okay that would be embarassing coz that would make me sound and obviously look like a loner.

The habit of staying late at night again , repeated again the very moment i m typing this post. i m also flooding my eyes with tons of chick flicks, again

I dont want to make this post sound like a , desperado . but .

i really am ,

i dont know

i m not normal

I want to be normal

Maybe.

Tomorrow

will

be

a better day

.

it will right?

 

 

 

.

X.