in a nutshell [POST SPM]

my major challenge in 2012, was SPM.

It officially ended on december 3rd, with my last paper which is chinese, and it didn’t exactly ended in a way I expected with a hall of students yelping and jumping in the air when the invigilator announced that the paper is ended and wished us all the best in the future… what I noticed are whisperings , many of them beaming in their smiles while I just sat there, imagining what my life may be AFTER SPM. but I sat there, only smiling, doing nothing… and I twirled back and smiled to my best friend, Carmen, sitting right behind me.

And… here comes the time to relax but still constantly threading thoughts of the future. What really lies, after SPM?

 

Does this proves that we are breaking up our relationship with government exams? Or this means eternally free from exams?

No I don’t really think so.

As SPM to me, is A stepping stone to my future (at least that’s what I thought of when I was working so hard for it ) half of my year in 2012, half of my 17-year-old-life I devoted for SPM. Looking back those days I only sat infront of my study desk, doing nothing but scribbling down and jotting down notes, and even more little notes just to strengthen my power on every single subject. I said farewell to my afternoon naps just to solve equations or revise thru the science theories of chemistry, biology and physics.

My life, was only – SPM

I now am free from those, routine filled days with only having the habit of biting my lip and memorizing those horrible things
!

Yet I don’t really blame SPM, to be honest. I thank the existence of having exams, and government exams,

look, I am not trying to be wise or being really like solomon telling you those facts or reality related stuff, but it’s true… going thru the years in my secondary school days, I hated exams. I hated how it can ruined my mood so badly and I hated how it can be so tiring staying up late to revise before exam
!! and then I finally received the horrifying truth that I actually dropped back to 3 classes before the class previous year, I turned from C class to F class, which means from the 3rd class to the 6th classs…… during form 3.

Form3 was my crucial year… as I was prepping for PMR. and I told myself that day that I should be hardworking and I should be well prepared for this PMR and proved everyone wrong, to prove everyone that a girl like me, a girl who likes shopping and reading mangas, also can score good results.

So I whisked thru trials… and finally bit my lip throughout the PMR…. results came out and YAY I scored 8A’s tho I keep doubtfully thought I wont score 8A’s and was totally thirst in confidence. Tbh, many of you out there might think im a girl with full confidence, but to be honest… im not

In the exterior, I might look like someone who is chitty chatty about everything but deep inside I am seriously wounded and petrified of my hard work. I believe in ‘when there’s a will theres a way’ I do. Yet sometimes I doubt myself.

This doubt then carries me till today.

Carried me during SPM, after SPM and before SPM.

But in another way, this doubt worked really well and drove me to be  a more hardworking person. This doubt made me believed in my dreams and to be hardworking and diligent to make my dreams come true. It’s the doubt deep inside that causes us to be pressured and stressed out. This doubt is the answer to my pimples increasing on my face, this doubt… made me a more, complex student.

I had everything I had, I can ask no more from life. I had a really great life and contented to have friends around me and teachers and a family that loves me, and I also had a great school life, and the most important thing will be my mindset towards exams. I thank my doubts, that made me into a really straightened-up student to be well aware of exams and to be well aware of my outward and inward development.

thank you SPM. and now , it’s taking it’s end and left me… empty.

The first few days right after SPM ended, I was elated, I was buoyant with happiness and joy !

And then immediately my mind was filled with adventurous and girly thoughts about the future.

Normally students, typical students I mean will be saying that they would want to have a boyfriend or even travel the world….

I think it was stupid enough to have that thought --------- that should be our life-long goal, our to-do-list in life and NOT, to-do-list AFTER SPM ! am I right?

Everyone sure wants that companion to be right beside us whenever we need them and that companion to tell u the sweetest things and share the close-knitted memories, I get it, who doesn’t have their wildest imaginations of their future? I do too but I think the end of SPM means, what we would want to achieve, after SPM, and not WHAT WE WANT, after SPM.

first things first.

GET A GREAT AMOUNT OF SLEEP !

SLEEP LIKE THERE’S NO TOMORROW !!!

I admit I am a heavy sleeper I can sleep anywhere and anytime if I want to, not because I need to but for students, we need to recharge our inner chakra and sleeep well !!! HAVE ALL THE TIME U NEED AND SLEEP !!!

After accomplishing that, you will need to then recharge your souls, and how so? By doing something you havent been doing because of SPM !

for me this instance will be updating myself with DRAMAS !

Yes for my readers who know me well I m a really diehard drama fan and can be biased instantly by hot guys and also a really diehard fan of MANGAS!

Yes !! rejoice yourself with things you havent been doing !!!

At least that’s what I have been doing for the past 2 weeks….. sleeping like a pig and doing nothing but relaxing in a state of bliss.

3rd !

R E AD amountful of books !!!

Your mind doesn’t really have to be in rest while u r celebrating the end of SPM, you need constant nourishment for the brain to interpret and absorb more of the things out there, besides the 10 subjects in SPM that flooded most of your memories. For example what I did was shopped for a lot of books in the book fair last week and settled down on the daily basis of 100-pages-a-day.

What I bought was

1. Jane Eyre

2. How to win friends and influence people

3. Oliver Twist

4. 30 thousand leagues under the sea

5. Pride and Prejudice and zombies

6. Shopaholic series

7. To kill a mockingbird

8. The Hobbit

And currently I am shameful enough to admit im only on number2, and working hard to remember as much as what Dale Carnegie implied on life.

I am required now to read as much as I can to be a more knowledgable person instead of a 17 year old girls that only knows a bit of everything instead of knowing everything of something…….

These are the major 3 to do…. the month after SPM, take 3 weeks will be more than enough as you rot in home with social networks(like me) or hanging out with your friends !

After for slackingg enough, then it’s commando-mode on. Please be aware enough that end of SPM doesn’t mean that you’re ended with responsibilities and self-awareness. The end of SPM means a beginning of a real-world-life. To be well prepared for your further studies that’s the step that shapes who you want to be in the future, that’s the step that marks down the beginning of your  future. Don’t lose your pace and please look ahead and be strong for whatever that comes along. Choose the right pathway, that leads you to emerald city, dear dorothy , (laughs)

Select what you want to study on, and be clear of what you wanted to be, and who you wanted to be !! Some people manage a really long path to finally realize who they might want to be

No matter what you had encountered in your past…. no matter what you had done bad or right in the past, that doesn’t defines who you are, what you do NOW, in the present defines who you will be in the future. Maybe you might be a really weak student or the student that got bullied in the past, or someone unnoticable in school or whatsoever, GET UP, stand up and look ahead.

What lies in your future, is right in your hands

Take a path, and don’t care what’s ahead , just go ahead, and , reach your dreams !

Improve yourself, pick up the things you left behind, help yourself, repair your flaws, and hold the bonds with your loved ones closer, and most importantly, LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST.

Remember, SPM , is not everything, it’s only the beginning .

Use your time wisely, as many people might loose their heads.

XX.