birthday lust

Yayy guys this is the month

It’s my birthday month . Been so excited lately and… had this little dream that something special might happen, yet year after year i dont feel any sparkle yet on the sixteenth day of June.

It makes me wonder over and over again what or how could I make my birthday memorable. definitely not by helding grandeur parties that would cost me a fortune or even … hmmmmm. I am not someone from the Kardashian or Jenners but still I need to find something special for my birthday to do. I searched the internet and found that there are some really charitable and philantrophic ways that people can actually do on their birthdays. Birthdays meant the celebration of our birth but conversely… it too signifies the pain and suffering of labor from our mothers… that had it all and suck up all the pain just for our arrival to this world… yet why do we keep lavishing on parties and presents whilst it’s actually the irony that birthdays….are actually something we shouldn’t really BE GREATLY  celebrating. But let’s not be so passive but in other means… a year after year we had these birthdays in a way is to cherish life.

Cherish that god made us alive for all these years and did not take away anything precious from us. God gave us healthy organs to live and we should be thankful that we are still alive. people who celebrate it with us, are the ones who love us and are thankful too that we are still around them to celebrate it with them

I too had a past of birthday parties that once held and i get to invite my friends to be with me for my birthday…. and I can’t be thankful enough to have these people that known me for who I am and chose to stay beside me instead of some people that chose to leave my life. But this is the way life works, we can’t possibly satisfy every single person you meet.Everyone has their this little mental checklist on their mind that cancels out people that don’t make it on their list or … let’s say some people just dont “CLICK” with us well that’s why we have these groups of stereotypes that linger around in society/

I chose to be with people that can accept me for who I am and still make me comfortable and easy around them. I keep a good image when i am taking pictures or whenever i am on social media… or whenever i go out i make sure i look photo ready or … Dont look fugly whenever i bump into anyone. These hello or goodbyes meant a lot to me because I am someone who takes first impressions very seriously, I wouldn’t like anyone to see my flaws or let anyone see my weakest and vulnerable moments/ (who does want people to notice their flaws) so in a simple way i am someone who thinks IMAGE is very important. In the world now, social media is everywhere and anyone can just talk about someone openly in groups in public and… sometimes i wish i can just put a stop on how people think of me. I don’t like people judging me without knowing who i am deep down… so …. if i don’t really look like how i m in picctures whenever i am with you, YOU ARE SPECIAL

YOU ARE SO F*KING SPECIAL AND U MEANT ALOT TO ME. Boy i had so many courage and i kept my pride to show who i truly am in front of you

These are the people i chose to be with. PEOPLE WHO I CAN SHOW MY TRUE SELF.

these are old pics and …. dedicated to my great friends that stayed by me no matter what

the thing is … for now I guess I couldn’t be more thankful than ever to have friends from secondary friends to real friends and i hope… in the future we might still remain intact although most of us are now going to separate ways but in some way i guess we are still connected in the way we talk and the way we react to things= this is called friendship. I guess there won’t be a cheerful side of me if there weren’t you guys holding up and always there to mend my broken heart. I will be sure to stand by each and every one of you if you were to falter.

XO, venetia .